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How to Surrender

Surrender. Does that word stump you?

For perfectionists (I’m raising my hand because I used to be one!), it can be a really challenging task to surrender. And not just challenging, but absolutely terrifying. You spend your whole life trying to control something, thinking you know exactly what you want and spending all your time trying to make that happen.

Then, there comes a time when you realize that what you thought you wanted is, in fact, not at all what you wanted. And coming to terms with that can suck. But that’s when surrender is needed. That’s when we need to let go of what we think we want and give it away to Spirit.

But how? How can we do this thing that is so hard for the perfectionistic part of us to do?

You know I’ve got your back, girl.

Tweet It: Surrender is an active choice to let go of expectations. Initially terrifying; ultimately freeing.

Such a blissful word can cause such stress? Yes. Our ego hates surrender. The inner control freak hates surrender. The over-achieving perfectionist hates surrender. But what you need to know is that, no you’re not crazy for feeling the following phases:

  • Close-Minded: “I know what I want.”
  • Lightbulb Moment: “I realize I don’t know what I want.”
  • “Oh shit!” Period: “I’m freaking out because I don’t know what I want.”
  • Try On Surrender: “I guess I’ll try this surrender thing.”
  • Keep Trying on Surrender: “Ugh, I can’t do surrender once – I must do it over and over.”
  • Peace and Freedom: “I need to do this surrender thing more often.”
  • Repeat.

Sound familiar? The two steps I’ve given you in this video will help you move through these faces with less struggle. I promise. You just have to – you guessed it – stay devoted and in a space of willingness to be open-minded. That’s it.

OVER TO YOU: Using the two simple steps in this video, what are you going to surrender? Comment below and share them with me!

All my love,

P.S. – If you know someone who needs to hear this message, please pass it along to them. 🙂

7 comments… add one

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  • Jen March 11, 2015


  • wonder March 12, 2015

    I have to share this:
    I’m working on a very personal short film (writer/director) and was hitting a wall with a particular part of the puzzle. We tried many solutions and nothing was working. Last night, I practiced this mediation and prayer, and sent it to my co-creator, too. I surrendered to not having the answer, not being able to “make” it work, and to possibly having to change the dates of the whole production. I felt lighter and more peaceful, and tried to lean into that trust and peace.

    This morning, the answer presented itself in my email inbox, a solution to the problem we have been fighting with. Incredible! So grateful! thank you Heather and Universe and God and angels!

    • Heather Waxman March 15, 2015

      Amazing, Wonder! Surrender is so where it’s at huh? You are a freakin’ rock star. Can’t wait to see your film!

  • Nicole March 18, 2015

    ok, I just have to say WOW…I can’t wait to put this into practice for several things in my life. thank you!

  • Yoona June 8, 2015

    Thank you so much for this. I had forgotten the necessity of surrendering to the universe and letting spirit handle things. This was an amazing reminder during an uncertain time! Thank you!!